Our Christmas

This year is Bug's fourth Christmas. Many other kids his age are excited about Santa Claus and all of the other fun stuff surrounding the season. Bug, frankly, doesn't care at all about any of that. I think a year or more ago, I might have been sad at the thought of Bug being like that, thinking that he would be missing out. But, I've found that he's  not missing out on anything - in fact, he's making our holidays better.

Bug understands things better when they are simple and concrete. So, we've simplified our holidays, which allows us all to focus on the most important aspects of Christmas: celebrating Jesus Christ's birth and life, spending time with family, and doing good things for others.

We've also been reflecting on the past year or so and how blessed we've been. As we have used our challenges and trials as opportunities to pray and try to be spiritually stronger, we have been blessed with a greater testimony of and closer relationship with our Savior. Yes, God sent His son because He loved the world, but He did it also because He loves me, and Bug, and each of us individually and unconditionally. Christ's example and atonement can strengthen us when we have sinned, when we are strong, when we have been hurt, when we feel downtrodden, and when we are living our daily lives. We've learned that better this year than any other time before.

This Christmas, simplify. Focus on the truly important parts of the holiday and don't worry about "missing out" on any of those extra things that, in the end, aren't the best part of the season. Enjoy your family. Be a little kinder. And, if you'd like to learn more about the first gift of Christmas and how you can be strengthened by Christ's life, view He Is The Gift.

Patience at Target

We had a great weekend. We went out, had fun, ate ice cream, made it through a good portion of church, and spent time with family. It tends to be easier to be patient and see the good in little things when the kids are happy and the day is going smoothly. Lately, my patience hasn't quite been where it should be, so I learned a lot and saw a lot of good this weekend.

The past few weeks, Bug has had a new thing to be particular about: going in and out of doors. At church, for example, he always goes in the far right door, then out the same one (so far left as we're leaving). He has decided he always wants to go in and out the same doors (the green "IN" doors) at places like Target, too. Usually, that's not a problem, but it's Christmastime and stores are much more busy and crowded than when we typically go out.

We've been working on this door thing, and the day was going so well, I was surprised when Bug stopped about 10 feet from the "OUT" door and silently started showing signs of agitation. He wanted to go out the "IN" doors - because green means go - but there were carts blocking the space between the two sets of doors and lots of customers. I tried talking him through it: "We go in the green and out the red!", "Look, all the people leaving are going through the red doors!", so on and so on. He wasn't having it. Dad tried some different logic, too. Still nothing. Still staying firmly in place, pointing at the green doors and wanting to leave against the flow of foot traffic.

It would have been easy to just pick him up and go to the car (something I've done before, with chaotic results), but we didn't want a meltdown and we weren't in any hurry. I started thinking about how Bug loves letters and is starting to recognize words, so I thought I'd try that - I felt it was a long shot, but couldn't hurt. And, wonderfully, that ("O-U-T spells 'out' and we need to go out!") got him to go, no problem.

Getting Bug through a door may seem like such a small thing, but it was a great lesson for me. First, as a parent (especially one to a child with special needs), you have to think creatively. What I thought would make sense to him, didn't. I had to try to see things from his perspective a little better and guess what track his brain was on. More importantly, for everyone to be happy and content, we had to do the hard thing. Standing in the exit of Target and trying to reason with a preschooler really isn't too hard in the grand scheme of things, but it's an experience that I need to remember. Instead of letting impatience and my feelings get in the way of things, we were patient and took the time to work through things with Bug instead of trying to change his thought process. We took the more difficult route, but the return was well worth the effort.